“I am expected to be an expert in everything or to be something like a Jack of All Trades and an expert. I can’t be all those things, I need to ask others.” Anonymous
"Being a Chief Executive can be very lonely. You can’t confide in your trustees or your staff, so where do you go for support? As a busy CEO I don’t have a lot of time for networking, so being part of a Tough at the Top peer group has been an excellent solution. I can talk issues through with other CEOs and we can share our experiences, frustrations and discuss solutions to problems. I look forward to the sessions because something valuable and useful always comes out of them. I feel I have benefited enormously from my involvement and would recommend it to all CEOs."
Gill Astarita, CEO, Volunteer Reading Help
“I need to know where to resource anything and everything and I need to know where my legal boundaries lie and how to check them. My group has become one of my major resources. ” Anonymous
"When I joined Tough at the Top in spring 2005, I was fairly new into my role as Chief Executive of Mosaic Clubhouse, a mental health charity based in South London. It took me a few months to really engage with the group and to let my guard down as it can take me time to build trust with people.
The role of Chief Executive is certainly a challenging and demanding role, but it can also be a lonely role and this is why meeting other Chief Executives on a monthly basis was really valuable to me.
Other people in my group were at different stages of their career and had different areas of skills, experience, expertise and perspectives. There was a real wealth of experience within the group and I found that by sharing challenges, I received encouragement and support. Often someone in the group was experiencing or had experienced something similar and were able to offer practical suggestions.
There were times when I was respectfully challenged and it made me feel uncomfortable. However, often after reflecting on what had been said I was able to gain a new insight into myself or the situation. I am really grateful for that safe space as some of this challenging substantially contributed to my ongoing development – both professionally and personally.
I would recommend joining a Tough at the Top group to any CEO – it is a smart investment of precious time."
Laura Borland, former Chief Executive,
Mosaic Clubhouse
“I am in no doubt that sometimes I feel very isolated and vulnerable. When I feel like that, my judgments on decisions can become distorted. I do have a peer group within my umbrella organisation, but that is entirely to do with policy and development. It is extremely helpful to have another type of peer support group with whom I can check in when I feel unsure.” Anonymous
“It is a relief to be able to benefit from other peoples' experience and not feel I have to constantly reinvent the bloody wheel!” Anonymous
"Having never experienced mentoring in a group context before, I didn’t really have any preconceptions other than the fervent hope that it wouldn’t turn out to be a form of encounter group where each member took it in turns to bare his or her soul. In the event I was pleasantly surprised by the easy camaraderie of the group members underwritten by the tacit understanding that we were all there to assist one another in dealing with the range of issues and problems which beset even those running the most ordered and harmonious charities. Whilst there was no sense of schadenfreude, it was very reassuring to find we were all dealing with very similar difficulties, a number of which stemmed from the complex relationship between chief executives and their trustees, who were necessarily volunteers.
I don’t know if all such groups function as effectively as ours did, and certainly I feel we were fortunate to have Amanda to enable our discussions, ensuring both that we remained focused and were able to provide constructive support for one another, and that those who were in most need at a given time received the greatest attention. It requires a particular set of skills to empower people to talk freely about their problems, drawing out not only the key difficulties but also underlying issues which may not have been apparent. We felt safe in the knowledge that our discussions were confidential to those in the room, who would be supportive and non judgmental, but we also felt emotionally secure in the empathetic environment which Amanda provided, free to discuss concerns which might otherwise have remained buried, without anxiety or fear." Anonymous
Amanda Falkson. Psychotherapycity.
Humanistic Psychotherapist & Counsellor in Central London.
© Amanda Falkson 2005
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