Keeping a diary has been a popular pastime for centuries. And journaling is a highly effective way to manage anxiety too.
Samuel Pepys is considered one of the godfathers of diary writing. He was an administrator in the Navy 1600s, but has earned a claim to fame through the subsequent centuries for a detailed diary that he kept from 1660 until 1669.
In more recent years and in our pop culture, we’ve had Sue Townsend’s series of diaries of Adrian Mole and Bridget Jones’ Diary.
Get it down on paper
For some people, writing a daily diary entry or adding journaling to their list of things to do can seem overwhelming. Yet another task to add to an already jam-packed day.
However, when we think of journaling as a way of getting things down on paper, we begin to see how this can help us.
The act of getting our thoughts on paper means we are getting them out of our head. This in itself is a strong way to reduce the power anxious thoughts often yield.
Once a thought is no longer running riot in our heads, but is now contained in a few lines of a diary, we’re dealing with a thought that’s now got nowhere to hide (our minds). We can now address this thought in ways that serve us, and we become the masters in this scenario. Anxious thoughts are no longer calling the shots.
I’m not claiming that dealing with anxiety is as simple as writing a few words down.
What I am saying, and have seen much evidence of in my own practice, is that any action that helps us calm tumultuous thoughts helps us find healthier ways of dealing with those thoughts.
The author Liz Gilbert shares similar views. While not speaking exclusively about anxiety, she has spoken frequently of the extreme depression she experienced at the demise of her first marriage. One of her ways of dealing with this experience was to write daily letters of tender compassion to herself.
Once down on paper, observation can begin
There’s no prescriptive way to journal. Find a way that suits you best and do that. There is no wrong way to do it.
For some people, this is daily. For others, it might be a little more fluid.
However, I’ve noticed a few outcomes from my clients who find a journaling rhythm that suits them and then stick to it.
The first outcome is that once their thoughts are on paper, they can see them from a distance and this allows space for perspective. This doesn’t necessarily happen after one day of writing, but over a little bit of time it is the first experience my clients excitedly discuss with me.
As we journal, we really engage in a deep conversation with ourselves. Putting our thoughts onto paper requires us to think deeply about them, question them, look at them from other sides. And ask a question that really does have the power to change our lives… is this true?
Often we will find that the answer is “no, it’s not”.
Space to write whatever you need to write
The term “safe spaces” has come into our mainstream vocabulary in the last few years, and does attract some controversy.
Taking the term absolutely for what “it says on the tin”, journaling is the safe space we give ourselves to let ourselves express what we really need to.
Needless to say, this is not always pretty.
Maybe you need to tear up the pages with expletive after expletive. Or maybe it is something more frightening than that.
Recently, a friend was chatting to me about a money mindset group they’re in.
In this group, a discussion was held around the money stories we grow up with in our families and a worksheet was set for the participants to engage more deeply with their money stories.
My friend’s money stories originated with her parents, and their fear and belief around there not being enough money in their household. In the worksheet, questions were asked that tugged at some sensitive thoughts and feelings as she unpacked her background and how this affects her current way of being in the world.
Writing about this was scary. On the one hand, she feels enormous compassion for her parents, and on the other, she can see how their choices weren’t always the healthiest.
Her journal was the safe space to confront these feelings and thoughts privately. By having the freedom to say what she needed to, warts and all, she found the catharsis she needed.
Taking care of ourselves takes many different forms.
Journaling is one way, and so is speaking to a trusted psychotherapist.
I work with clients around the world with my online therapy practice. Please feel free to contact me if you’d like to explore how therapy might help you. I’d be delighted to connect.